Posts Tagged ‘Divorce Cases’

Divorce Mediation

Saturday, April 24th, 2010

Divorce mediation has become a more affordable and harmonious way to deal with ones divorce. But its significant to note that not all divorce cases are meant for divorce mediation.

In cases where you have an abusive spouse, the safety that the Court may provide would be recommended. When you are dealing with a spouse who perpetually argues with every word that passes your lips, then its highly unlikely that youll be able to confer about concerns of divorce through mediation.

As long as there are issues that need to be addressed due to a lack of cooperation on either side, mediation will not quite cut it. In cases where you are having difficulty finding middle ground with your spouse, it would be a good idea to seek the legal help of a divorce attorney instead.

Divorce mediation requires compromise

Divorce mediation is possible and helpful if both parties are willing to compromise and agree to confer with one mediator rather than seek the legal advice of separate attorneys. This does help both parties save on expensive court fees. Mediation can greatly reduce the total expense of the divorce procedure and you and your mate will generally have more control over the agreement.

The benefits of mediation normally help the agreement along, leading to a successful and enduring settlement. It has also been observed that mediation is not as distressing on the children as a full-blown court case with lawyers and all. This point alone can make mediation instantly appealing to a problematic couple.

What exactly is mediation?

Divorce mediation involves a mediator who assists a couple in coming to an agreement. Unlike what many may believe, a mediator isnt there to make the decisions for you. Nor will he/she tell you and your mate how things ought to be. A divorce mediator will simply sketch out the matters at hand for you and your mate as he/she assists you in your own decision making. This process is normally accomplished through a series of questions as well as concentration on results rather than dwelling on disputes. Even as some arguments may occur, one mustnt be so quickly discouraged. The mere fact that both parties agreed to try mediation means that they are able to cooperate with one another. Normally, the idea of how mediation saves their children from further distress can encourage a couple to come to an amicable agreement.

How long will it take?

The mediation period may be just a number of weeks to even an entire year. It really depends on you and your spouse and the complexity of the matters concerned. If you both are able to reach a harmonious agreement early on, it will be fairly easy to shorten the process of mediation.

In order to help this process along, both parties should be completely aware of his/her rights as well as the possible alternatives which are accessible. The mediator will supply the parties with a Memorandum of Agreement. A Separation Agreement may then be written from the basis of this prior agreement. An attorney may be required in translating the agreements.

Child custody, in and out of court settling of San

Sunday, January 17th, 2010

Child custody, in and out of court settling of San Diego divorce cases

With the increase in the number of San Diego divorce cases, there comes a complication of the issue of child custody to an extent that could not have been imagined before. A San Diego divorce case does not entail just the problem of the separation of the two spouses, but also the division of assets, assigning child custody and handling the taxes in a beneficial way for the divorcing parties. Because of the legal complications of the San Diego divorce cases and the associated child custody hearings, lawyers find themselves getting closer and closer to the separating couple, to the extent of becoming some sort of personal advisors. On many occasions, the lawyer is the only one to be able to properly deal with the complexities of a San Diego divorce. A San Diego divorce can become so stressful that the members of the couple end up losing control of their behavior, especially when child custody is at stake.

The issue of child custody may appear during several stages of a San Diego divorce case. For one thing, given the delicate nature of the situation, the attorneys may advise the couple to settle child custody out of court, so as not to leave the final decision in the hands of a judge that does not personally know the family and their circumstances. However, the question of children can be so hard to agree on, that the parents may just decide to leave it up to the court and then a large portion of a San Diego divorce trial will focus on child custody. According to the judges, the toughest question to settle during a San Diego divorce is precisely whom to leave the children with. Usually, a San Diego divorce and the associated child custody battle will be settled in favor of the mother.

The ruling passed by the judge may not be the final word in a San Diego divorce case though. After the confrontation in court, the struggle of the San Diego divorce can continue unofficially and may even take on violent forms. Especially as regards child custody, things can get rough, as one of the parents may decide to by-pass the decision made during the San Diego divorce trial and kidnap the child from the custodian parent. Although this is not the norm, it can happen that emotionally unstable parents feel the decision of the judge to be so unjust that they have to take the issue into their own hands. The kidnapping is possible because the child will trust the non-custodial parent, so the little one may be taken away without much ado. If there is a need for a stronger confrontation, the threat of fire weapons may be used, which is possible in the case of a San Diego divorce given the extensive availability of fire guns in California.

When the situation gets aggravated to such an extent, it is usually only the divorce lawyer that can intervene. The attorney will first establish the legal framework for getting the child back to the custodial parent. In order to do this, the lawyer will go back to the judge of the San Diego divorce trial and ask for a restraining order against the non-custodial parent, thus emphasizing the danger that he/ she represents for the child. The lawyer will then make use of his professional connections with the police, detective agencies, and the district attorneys office in order to trace the parent who took off with the child. These are resources that are not readily available for the custodial parent. Once the kidnapper parent has been located, the lawyer will try to establish a channel of communication with him, either by entering into dialogue with the kidnapper, or by putting the two parents into contact with each other. If the child is thus recuperated, the attorney has to secure that the custodial parent and child will be protected from the repetition of the deed. It is only after child custody has been thus settled that the San Diego divorce case can be considered closed.

San Diego divorce cases, just like all divorce cases around the United States, have become more numerous and more stressful for the parties involved. There seems to be a larger degree of alienation between the feelings and wishes of the family going through the separation and the results achieved in court. This happens because of the high degree of specialization of the divorce cases, which makes it impossible for the members of the couple to handle the separation and the associated settlements themselves. Because of this reason, all will be decided during a legal case, where -attorneys will argue for the two positions and an unknown judge will pass the final ruling. Not surprisingly, one of the two parties, if not both, will find the resolution of the case suboptimal, or even traumatic. This feeling of frustration, combined with the general high stress level associated with any divorce, may lead to violent acts, such as the kidnapping of children. In this situation again, it is the -lawyers and judges that will locate the culprit and assign the appropriate punishment. The two spouses turn from lovers into warring factions.

Advice From A Divorce Attorney?

Monday, December 14th, 2009

I believe that divorce is one of the biggest epidemics in our current society that isn’t being recognized or treated as such. As a marriage and family therapist, of course divorce is something that I am passionate about because it is something that I am spending my life to fight against. I am not ignorant enough to believe that I will see all cases of divorce end during my lifetime, nor am I ignorant enough to believe that all divorce cases even should be prevented. I am, however, perhaps ignorant in my belief that it is crazy for people considering divorce to get advice from a divorce attorney.

Now, most of you are thinking I’m crazy. Who would go to a divorce attorney for advice about their failing marraige? Many people, unfortunately. I had no idea until I began working with marriages and families in crisis just how many individuals and even couples were seeking refuge and advice with their divorce attorney.

I was overwhelmed by my new knowledge for one primary reason. Have people considering getting a divorce forgotten that a divorce attorney is the very last person who will be concerned with them repairing a broken marriage? A divorce attorney makes a living helping married people get divorced while getting as many benefits from the divorce as possible. So why would any nearly-divorced person go to a divorce attorney in hopes of fixing their marraige? Beats me.

My advice to anyone struggling in their marriage is to make an appointment to visit a professional counselor or a marriage and family therapist. The core reason why I suggest this is because in general, counselors and therapists are people who deeply want to see marriages and families restored rather than torn apart. If I am looking for someone to help me fix my car, then it is far wiser to get help from an individual who actually believes that cars can be fixed, right? Of course. The same is true with marriage. Do not go for help to someone who believes that marriages should end easily and for any reason at all. Go instead to a professional who is trained in giving you wisdom about ways to make your relationship work.

A divorce attorney is great for people who are sure that divorce is the option they are choosing. If, however, you are still unsure of your options and if you are still hoping for healing in your marriage, then a divorce attorney is the last person you should see.